Few medical cases have carried the weight and controversy of David Reimer’s life. Born in Canada in 1965, he became the subject of a radical experiment meant to prove that gender identity could be shaped entirely by upbringing rather than biology.
Following a tragic accident in infancy, doctors convinced his parents to raise him as a girl, despite the fact that he was born male.
At a time when the debate over nature versus nurture dominated psychology and medicine, his case was promoted as proof of the theory that gender was flexible.
For years, his experience was cited as evidence for a flawed theory of gender neutrality, until the truth emerged—revealing not only profound suffering but also the grave consequences of placing theory and ambition above human dignity.
The twins: Brian (left) and Bruce/Brenda (right).
Infancy and a Botched Circumcision
David Reimer was born on August 22, 1965, in Winnipeg, Manitoba, the elder of identical twin boys. His parents, Janet and Ron, named him Bruce, while his brother was called Brian.
The twins appeared healthy at birth, but when they were six months old, doctors diagnosed them with phimosis, a condition that affects the foreskin and can cause difficulties in urination.
At seven months, the boys were referred for circumcision. Instead of using the standard surgical method, the physician performing the procedure, Dr. Jean-Marie Huot, attempted electrocauterization, which employs an electric current.
The result was catastrophic—Bruce’s penis was burned beyond repair. His brother Brian was spared the same fate, as his condition resolved naturally without surgery.
Born Bruce Reimer and biologically male, David was forced into a gender transition as an infant.
The Reimers were devastated. Local doctors offered few practical solutions, and the idea of raising their son without functional male genitalia left the family searching for answers.
In 1967, while watching television, Janet and Ron saw Dr. John Money, a psychologist at Johns Hopkins University, discussing cases of intersex children who had been reassigned as girls.
Money’s confident claims that gender identity was flexible in infancy gave the grieving parents hope. They believed they had found a path that could give Bruce a chance at a “normal” life.
The twins Brian and Bruce (Brenda)
A Life Reassigned
John Money was already well known for promoting his “theory of gender neutrality.” He argued that gender was not fixed at birth but instead shaped primarily by social upbringing and environment.
In Bruce’s case, Money saw what he believed was a perfect opportunity: an identical twin brother who could serve as a control subject, allowing him to demonstrate the power of nurture over biology.
Money persuaded the Reimers to agree to sex reassignment. At 22 months old, Bruce underwent surgery to remove his testes, and surgeons constructed rudimentary female genitalia.
His parents began raising him as “Brenda.” To the outside world, Brenda would be a little girl, while her twin brother Brian grew up as a boy.
Growing up as Brenda Reimer.
From that point forward, John Money closely followed the case, presenting it in medical literature as the “John/Joan case.”
He reported the reassignment as a success, describing Brenda as a healthy, thriving girl who enjoyed playing with dolls and displayed typical female behaviors.
In reality, Brenda was deeply unhappy. From a young age, she resisted wearing dresses, preferred traditionally male activities, and expressed discomfort with the role being forced upon her.
The Reimer family.
According to John Colapinto, who published a biography of Reimer in 2001, the sessions with Money included what Money called “childhood sexual rehearsal play”.
Money theorized that reproductive behaviour formed the foundation of gender, and that “play at thrusting movements and copulation” was a key aspect of gender development in all primates.
Starting at age six, according to Brian, the twins were forced to act out sexual acts, with David playing the female role—Money made David get down on all fours, and Brian was forced to “come up behind [him] and place his crotch against [his] buttocks”.
Money also forced David, in another sexual position, to have his “legs spread” with Brian on top. On “at least one occasion” Money took a photograph of the two children doing these activities.
At 14, David Reimer (right) chose to live as a male.
When either child resisted these activities, Money would get angry. Both David and Brian recall that Money was mild-mannered around their parents, but ill-tempered when alone with them.
When they resisted inspecting each other’s genitals, Money got very aggressive.
Both David and Brian were traumatized with Brian speaking about it “only with the greatest emotional turmoil”, and David unwilling to speak about the details publicly.
Brenda Reimer in a portrait. On the right, a family photo.
Struggles in Adolescence
As Brenda grew older, the cracks in Money’s theory widened. At school, classmates sensed something different about her.
She was teased, ostracized, and often referred to as “cavewoman.” Attempts to feminize her appearance with dresses and hormone treatments failed.
Far from embracing the identity imposed on her, Brenda grew more withdrawn and distressed.By the time she reached her early teens, the strain had become unbearable.
At 13, Brenda confided to her parents that she could no longer bear living as a girl. She threatened to end her life if she were forced to continue under John Money’s care. Desperate for a solution, her parents decided to reveal the truth.
David Reimer in his teenage years.
On March 14, 1980, at the age of 14, Brenda was told about the accident, the surgeries, and the reassignment. The revelation was shocking but also liberating.
She finally understood why she had never felt at ease in the identity imposed upon her. Choosing to reclaim her male identity, Brenda took the name David, symbolizing a fresh start.
Medical treatment followed. David began testosterone therapy, underwent a double mastectomy, and later had phalloplasty surgeries to reconstruct male genitalia. For the first time since infancy, he was allowed to live as the person he knew himself to be.
David Reimer, despite a life marked by hardship, shared a meaningful and loving relationship with his wife, Jane.
Adulthood and Speaking Out
In the years that followed, David sought stability. He worked a variety of jobs, including in a slaughterhouse, and later found employment in trades and labor.
In 1990, he married Jane Fontane and adopted her three children, building the family life he had long desired.
He enjoyed camping, fishing, and collecting antiques, small pleasures that grounded him after a childhood filled with turmoil.
David’s story, however, could not remain private. In the 1990s, academic sexologist Milton Diamond persuaded him to share his experience publicly in the hope of preventing similar cases. Until then, John Money’s reports were still cited as evidence that reassignment could succeed.
David Reimer, pictured here, had not made his name public at the time of this article’s publication in 1997. Here, he goes by John.
In 1997, David’s case was made public, and three years later journalist John Colapinto published the biography As Nature Made Him: The Boy Who Was Raised as a Girl.
The book revealed the full extent of David’s suffering and discredited Money’s claims. It became a best-seller and sparked widespread debate over ethics in medicine and psychology.
David’s willingness to speak out influenced doctors to abandon similar reassignment experiments on infants.
David shortly before his passing.
A Tragic End
Despite his courage and efforts to reclaim his life, David continued to face personal struggles. His past left lasting wounds that were not easily healed.
In 2002, his twin brother Brian died from an overdose of psychiatric medication, a loss that devastated David. He visited Brian’s grave daily, overwhelmed with grief.
In addition to mourning his brother, David faced new hardships. He lost his job, suffered financial setbacks, and his marriage fell apart. The weight of these challenges grew heavier over time.
On the morning of 4 May 2004, Reimer killed himself with a shotgun in his hometown of Winnipeg. He was 38 years old.
A portrait of David Reimer.
(Left) as Brenda, (Right) David Reimer as a young man.
For the first 30 years after Money’s initial report that the reassignment had been a success, Money’s view of the malleability of gender became the dominant viewpoint in the field, reassuring practitioners that sexual reassignment of infants was the correct decision in certain instances.
Diamond’s report and Colapinto’s subsequent book about Reimer influenced several medical practices, reputations, and even current understanding of the biology of gender.
Videos
Why the Boy Who Was Raised as a Girl Forgave His Mother | The Oprah Winfrey Show
The Boy Who Was Turned Into a Girl Series
(Photo credit: In Memory of David Reimer on Facebook / Wikimedia Commons).